She is in her early 50’s. She may be 5 feet tall; she may weigh 100 pounds. She declares “My pack weighs 5.8 kilograms; I can’t carry anymore.” There is a quiet, melancholy confidence to her.

Similar to other chance meetings between pilgrims, a small group meet along the trail. We walk together and then split as we try to find our different lodgings in the new town. As we all separate, she says “Tomorrow is my birthday.” I wish her a happy birthday and begin to walk away, but I stop and call to her. “Wait, take this 5 Euro note and buy yourself a glass of wine.”

Our paths cross two days later. In the small village of Monteriggioni, population 50, we are both staying in the Ostello. Her room has 5 other pilgrims; my room has 3 other pilgrims. We get a reservation at a restaurant right across from the Ostello.

During dinner, we chat in familiar pilgrim ways. The difficulty of finding rooms if one hasn’t pre-booked. Our fellow 75-year old pilgrim friends from New Zealand couldn’t find lodging here. Fortunately, there is a train stop here so they trained to Sienna. We talk about the adjustment of solitary walking and the anticipated large tourist Siena.

Although as I mentioned in a previous post that sometimes there is a hesitancy to talk much about one’s past, our conversation drifts there. If I understand her, she is a vetinarian who works for her government, researching and analyzing data about animal issues, and then writing various policy proposals. She’s worked in this general field for 30-years.

“Why are you walking?” She responds to my question, “I want to find More.” My ears perk up.

“I grew up Roman Catholic. I grew up with a religion controlled by priests, a religion that seemed to always be about death, and with images of a man bleeding on a cross. I left that version. I was never taught that much of that language is metaphor. I wasn’t taught that we can’t ever fully describe God.” She continues, “My life has been built searching for facts, relying on facts, trusting science.” “Yet now, I want More.”

I’m struck. While it may seem her words are fairly conventional, her words take on a different significance on the Via Francigena. I find that most who want “More” talk about “More” clarity about their future, should I take a new job? Should I move to a new location during my upcoming retirement? Her question is different. “ I want to find if there is a More.”

I think about what to say. “ As a teacher, I wanted to help my students question the boxes that they put their God-ideas into. Some had a box that God is all-powerful. Snap your fingers, say a prayer, God comes running, and grants your request. A God of magic. A pretty clear and small box.” Or, I’m United Methodist, we have just had a split in our denomination over issues of sexuality. I continue, “Some students had a box that knows without any doubt what God expects of us. What Gods rules are. A God of Absolutes.” “Sometimes, all-the-time, we limit God. I’m glad that you can see that we do that.”

She pauses and responds, “Do you want to hear more?” “Sure, wondering what she would say.

“ I was married for twenty years. My husband and I both become more and more alcoholic. I realized that I needed to change. I realized that I couldn’t change him, that he wouldn’t change. We divorced.”

I ask: ”How has this walk gone for you then?”

“When I arrived several days ago, I was in my room the first night. I was lonely and scared. But, I decided to pay attention. I didn’t turn to my phone or tv to divert myself. I’ve kept it off.”

I ask: “What have you seen?” Quickly, she replies. “I’m enjoying others around me. I notice the kindness of other’s around me.”

Since she had talked about God earlier, I had a choice. On the one hand, I could introduce theoretical theological ideas. I could say “You speak of enjoyment and others’ kindness, maybe God is in those actions.” I know not to talk about Austin Farrer’s reformulation of classic theism and “two agents for every act”, simply on entirely different planes. Or, my own reformulation, that one Agent acts in a three-fold manner. But, those thoughts are too abstract for her personal speaking. On the other hand, I could ask simply “tell me more.”

She continues. “The next day, I meet Cheryl and Pam. I’m amazed at two 75-year old women walking 150 miles. I meet several Italians. We talk and laugh. I loved it. Then I meet you before my birthday. The next. Day I toasted you.”

I’m not ready for that statement. “You did what?”

“I bought a glass of wine for my birthday. I imagined you sitting across the table. I toasted you.”

I smile. I smile because that is the first time I’ve been toasted in abstentia. I smile. She is already finding her “More.”